We all get angry. It’s one of the many traits we have as human beings, but only because constantly having to interact with one another has proven to be really, really hard. When those around us don’t consider our thoughts or feelings, well… we get pissed off. We can see this on a small scale, like when our friends say the wrong thing and hurt our feelings, or when people cut us off while we’re driving, which can be really frustrating. We can also see it on a much larger scale: the 9/11 tragedy hurt the world’s trust and faith in one another, and as a result, a lot of hate was directed towards the group who was given responsibility for the events. We all get scared, and upset. We all feel the need to voice the hurt we feel. So, we speak out in anger. We talk about our friends behind their backs, we make rude gestures towards the people who trigger our road rage, and we post passionate hate comments on social media, about how certain people, or groups of people, are the absolute worst.
This probably seems very minuscule in the grand scheme of things. Maybe it’s just because we’re desensitized to this kind of behaviour coming from each other, but I’ve noticed that this way of expressing ourselves has become second nature to us all. We judge each other, point out each other’s flaws, and can be more aggressive than we realize. Yet, it’s extremely difficult to not only stop being angry at people, but also to avoid getting angry in the first place, or to redirect and get rid of your feelings of anger. I personally tried being patient, and not losing my temper for an entire week, and, uh, let’s just say that I was absolutely awful at it. I tried, I really did, but I realized that there’s also comfort found in speaking your thoughts about hurtful and negative things. Living our lives, while being able to manage negative emotions effectively, is something we should all practice, though, and I’ve found it can become easier if you think of this rule:
“Promote what you love, don’t bash what you hate.”
- Lilly Singh
One way to relieve yourself of the tension and yucky feelings that accompany emotions like anger and resentment, is to really focus on the good things. We have so much to be grateful for, and if we recognized that throughout the hardest, most frustrating times, it could really humble us all and impact our daily lives. If everyone just promoted what they loved, instead of spending time and energy on negative feelings, circumstances, and interactions, we’d all feel a lot better. Maybe the world would become a calmer, and more positive place. In this way, when your friend hurts your feelings, focus on what you love about them, what you love about yourself, and your relationship with them. When that driver cuts you off, focus on the fact that you’re in a car, and you have the capability to get where you need to go, relatively easily. When you blame certain groups for the many tragedies that strike our world, there’s no need to attack the entire group with hurtful words; just make an effort to promote positivity, love, and hope. Hurting others and holding grudges generally doesn’t bring happiness to anyone; spreading love and immersing yourself in what brings you happiness, can.
Promote what you love, don’t bash what you hate.